"The Cover Gal!"

Have you ever heard someone say, "Don't judge a book by it's cover?" But what if you really don't want to give it a try and learn more about it? You really don't want to give it a chance... What do you do?

Say there's a person, place, thing, or even profession that you don't think is for you. Do you just cast them aside and try to ignore them? Or do you try to read between the lines before deciding how you feel about it? I will use myself as an example. I'm moving to New Jersey when I graduate from high school. The plan is we will go to the Capri Institute. But I'm having second thought. I'm still planning on going to New Jersey, but I don't think Capri is for me. I'd rather go into the line of criminal justice. Yes, I want to be a cop. I was thinking of taking online college courses. Does that mean I should eliminate Capri as a possible place to go and hairstyling as a possible profession? I've been asking myself that for the past few days.

How about another example? Say you meet someone, but they seem totally weird, or they did something you didn't like. Your first instinct is to completely ignore the person. What do you do? Never give said person the time of day? Or do you try to get to know them better before you judge them? If you never take the chance, you may have missed meeting a new friend or maybe even a future lover.
When you're deciding what to do, remember the good thing about taking the time to get the person, you have the possibility of meeting a new friend. The bad thing? IF you don't become friends, you waste about five minutes of your life. Big whoop. You should never judge a book by its cover. The book may turn out to be something very valuable.

"It's A One Way Street..."

Have you ever had someone like you, but you don't like them like that? Sadly, that happens to me... a lot. How do you react to it? Are you like me? Do you completely ignore them and hope they move away? Or do you discuss it with them and hope you can still be friends? Everyone reacts differently.In my past experience, a lot of people seem to like me, mostly people I hate... which, by the way, sucks. And sadly, the one guy I like won't give me the time of day.

Back to my original topic, I regret to say, I don't have the best reaction when someone I hate likes me. (And to anyone I may have hurt, I apologize, I have trust issued.) If I am good friends with them, I will gladly talk it out with them, because I don't wan't to ruin our current, friendly relationship. But otherwise... I kind of go... berserk. I completly ignore said person. I'm not the best with things I don't like... But I am only one girl, I don't know how other people react.

If someone who you don't like likes you, then, please, try not to go berserk and completely ignore them... or throw things at them. Try to talk it out with the person and explain how you don't like them. And if you like someone, but they don't like you back, (unless they're your best friend or something), tell them but understand they don't like you and please don't try to convince them into a date... just saying.

"Just Say Goodbye!"

Have you ever really liked someone, but they're just not that into you? I'm going through that right now. I really like someone, but I know for a fact he doesn't like me. Maybe he did once, but not anymore.

I have reason to believe this person liked me two years ago, but I hated him. He was just so annoying. Then we were put into the same math class the following year. He still annoyed me. But something changed. I don't know what, but I started falling for him. Then he went out with some other girl. They ended quickly, but now I had my answer. He was over me. Maybe he didn't like me at all.

After two months with not seeing him, a boyfriend, and now speaking to him about twice in seven months, I still like him. But I've come to realize, I don't need him. My life is set. After I graduate I'm going to New Jersey. I'm going to live with my two best friends. We're going to go to the Capri Institute. I don't need a guy to drag me down, I don't need a breakup before I go to New Jersey.

And you don't need to wait for someone who just isn't that into you. And don't change your life for someone. Follow you're dreams and live the life you deserve. It's time to say goodbye to the one you can't get out of your mind... and say hello to a more confident, real you.

"Ready, Set, Go!"

A recent thought of my last relationship got me thinking. When is someone ready to do 'it', and should they do 'it' even if they aren't ready? My ex always dropped hints that he was ready, even after only three weeks of dating. The thing is, I'm only fourteen and he's sixteen, so I wasn't ready. I told him I wasn't ready and that I thought I was too young. He thought he could change my mind. He was wrong.

No one is absolutely sure when they're ready. And everyone thinks of there first time differently. Some people just want to get it over with, and some people want to wait until they're married so it can be special. Girls are like snowflakes, no two girls are exactly the same. But guys, here is my advice. NEVER try to rush into a relationship and NEVER try to rush a girl into bed. Because she's probably going to dump you. Girls need time and don't like to think they're just a sex toy.

When a girl is ready, she will give you hints. If you're one of the guys who need time to be ready, most of us will respect you and wait. Except if the girl is a slut. Never date a slut. My point is, sex is a special time and everyone is ready to do it at different times. Don't rush into it, because you might end up regretting it. So when you face the choice of yes or no, think to yourself... are you ready?

"Is It Over?"

How do we know when a relationship is over? Do we miss the signs of a failing relationship? Sometimes when someone is dumped, they don't know what went wrong... and when. The truth is, we often miss the signs. Sometimes we don't even know we are showing signs ourselves.

Do you think you're becoming distant from your significant other? Are you afraid of being dumped soon? Here are some signs you may have missed:

1.(S)He seems bored, distant, and distracted when you go out.

2. You see (s)he checking out other girls/guys.

3. (S)He tries to avoid kissing/hugging you. When you do, he seems distracted  and resistant.

4.(S)He often cancels dates or makes up excuses to not hang out.

I'm sorry to say, but sometimes you can't get him/her back. Sometimes his/her feelings change. Sometimes they like someone else and don't want to deal with the guilt. They end the relationship, before it becomes too serious or they do something like cheat on you, so they don't hurt you even more. When I broke up with my boyfriend, it wasn't only because he was an asshole. It was partly because I was developing feelings for someone else.

Sometimes you can't change the fate of your relationship. Sometimes, it's not meant to be. To those who have been recently dumped, it's not your fault. Go out and find someone you can be with for a long time. To those who have recently dumped someone, it may be bad now, you may feel guilty about hurting him/her now, but think what could have happen in the future. Things could have gotten to serious. (S)He would fall in love, and you wouldn't, so you would end up hurting them more. Think to yourself, is there anything that could save your relationship? And, how long would it last?

"The Cycle Of A Heartbreak."

Sooner or later we get involved with someone. And sometimes things go wrong... terribly wrong. And the relationship ends. Everyone wants to forget there failed relationship, and sooner or later we finally do. But do we ever fully get over it? Or does our failed relationship end up haunting us, leaving emotional and mental scars?

At the beginning of summer, I met a guy who I really liked. He was kind and sweet. We ended up dating. But there was something he did I totally hated. He liked to do drugs... and to a lesser degree drink. Even though he knew I disagreed with it. He promised me he would stop, but didn't. That was only one thing he did. He also got into my shirt and made me feel violated and slutty. Especially when he tried, and failed, to convince me to sleep with him. I ended up dumping him soon after.

The reason I am telling you about my horrible relationship is because I am using myself as an example. Now, thanks to my first relationship, I am scarred... mentally and physically. I am afraid to enter another relationship. I am afraid men all turn out bad and only want woman for the sex. I am uncomfortable when anyone, male or woman, friend or acquaintance, hugs me. It took time to even start trusting other people. Some I still can't stand being near them. A relationship leaves scars, and scars never go away. The solution to these problems are good friends, a new outlook on life, and time.

I know I wouldn't have gotten through the break up and the recovery without my best friend. She makes me smile when I cry and shows me I can trust people. She was the first person I trusted again. I don't think I ever stopped trusting her. But my best friend was just the beginning. Some of my friends are real bitches and can't be completely trusted, but I can still laugh and hang out with them. And then, there was the task of trusting men again. The process of trusting men again was slow, until I met one of my best friends good friends. He helped me realize not all men are sex crazed douche bags. He's even the reason I started my blog.

My point in all of this is simple. We love, and we lose. And our lost comes back to haunt us. I loved my boyfriend, but I lost my faith in everyone. It's okay to hurt after a relationship, to be distant. But there are always friends that can help you through the pain and confusion. To those who just got out of a relationship on bad terms, the pain goes away, and you start to trust again. What do your friends do when you need comfort? And are you the kind of friend someone can turn to for comfort?

"The Perfect Possibility?"

What is a perfect relationship? Is it when there is no fighting, no drama, no betrayal and amazing sex? Is there such thing? Is there such thing as a relationship where both partners never disagreed? They agree on everything? I have yet to hear of such a relationship... and probably never will.

Everyone has different opinions about what the perfect relationship is. More communication, less communication. More sex, or more dates. Sometimes, people just want a maid or a butler...not a partner. We all want something different. So unless you find someone exactly like you , you probably won't have the perfect relationship you envisioned.

A perfect relationship can get boring. No drama, no conflict. Just the same thing everyday. Think of  relationship as a book. People will continue reading the book if there is a bit of conflict. If there is no conflict, then the story gets boring and people put down the book and walk away. If you want your relationship to last, you need something to spice it up. Something like a little disagreement can help. And if you happen to be in a big fight and make amends with your partner, a little make up sex would be great too. A relationship can't stay intact if the relationship gets boring.

Some of you may disagree with me. You may say that absolutely no arguing is the way to keep a relationship together. If it has worked for you, who am I to tell you to stop. But if you're looking for the perfect relationship but still aren't happy, you may need to reconsider what a perfect relationship is. In my eyes, a perfect relationship is that of equal partners. No one 'wears the pants' in the relationship. The couple can get into some heated arguments, but never let a little argument break them apart. Instead, they are closer than ever. One less thing to fight about. And they are still together.

You can think what you want. You can think that a perfect relationship is when no arguments occur, or when someone is the boss of the other. You can think the perfect relationship is friends with benefits, no talk, no dates, just sex. But... is there truly such thing as the "perfect relationship"?

"Sex And The Suburbs!"

Everyone knows what peer pressure is, but it seems most people have difficulty admitting that they can be pressured into doing something they otherwise wouldn't do. People can be pressured into doing drugs, smoking a cigarette, or even having sex. Something in our mind tells us it's a bad idea. Our conscience, the little voice in our head that tells us right from wrong, tells us, "Don't do it. Don't do it. It's a bad idea. Don't do it." Sometimes we choose to follow our consciences advice and say no and walk away. Sometimes, we choose to ignore our conscience and fall to peer pressure. The choice is yours, so... What is your choice? Right or Wrong?

Picture this. You meet a guy. He seems perfect. You start to like him and he seems to like you too because he asks you out. You believe you're taking things slow, but too slow for him. After only your second week together, even though he knows you want to take things slow, he decided to ignore your wish. As soon as you're alone,  he lays you down on the couch, and he sticks his hand up your shirt. You tell him no. That he was your first boyfriend and you wanted to take things slow. He tries to convince you. He says, "It's what normal couples do. Stop being a prude. Just go with it." He finally convinces you. That's what peer  pressure is. When you don't want to do something, but a friend convinces you to anyway, usually by saying everyone else did it. Listen to me. If you don't want to, then don't. It doesn't matter who decides to do it, it matters what you want to do.

Imagine the same guy decides, your chest isn't enough. He wants more. He leaves subtle hints. "I always keep a condom in my guitar case. Just in case you ever want to..." he says, or, "That condom in my guitar case is taking up room. I would throw it out, but my mom taught me to never waste anything. Any suggestions on how I get rid of it?" Just a bit of advice. Stop him right there. Tell him no. Tell him no and walk away. If you don't think your ready, tell him. If he doesn't understand, dump him. It's simple.

My opinion on peer pressure is clear... I don't like it. I don't think someone should be pressured into doing something they wouldn't do otherwise. I don't understand why they would ruin themselves just because they're friends wanted them to do it. If you get in trouble, don't say you were pressured to. It's your fault for doing it. You always have a choice. No matter what you think, you always have a choice.

Peer Pressure... It can make a person do crazy things. But are there positive things about peer pressure? Maybe, if you want to look at it that way. But do you want to be pressured into something you wouldn't dare do otherwise? Will you ignore your conscience? And if you do, are you willing to live with the consequences?