"A Couple Becomes A Crowd"

Exactly how many people get emotionally involved in a relationship? When you sleep with someone, could you also be unknowingly screwing the family as well? When a relationship unfortunately dies, precisely how many people could you be losing other than your ex? Think about everyone you have met through this former lover - (S)he's family, friends and possibly their child(ren), too. They could too get hurt if the relationship does not work out in the end. Now, what the hell are you supposed to do ... Do you continue to communicate, or are you doomed to losing them forever?

For a moment, let us question, how exactly could one person that you no longer have a relationship with control your relationships with others? Perhaps you're simply trying to spare yourself of the awkwardness and embarrassment, trying to avoid those individuals asking why the relationship failed, petrified of realizing you may still love your former lover. It could be all three, as they could result to be inextricably linked. However, you can't just run away from these things ... In one way or another, they will inevitably come up.

If you and your ex decide to maintain a friendship, it's easy to keep the bond rolling with the others who're involved. But, what if maintaining a friendship with your ex isn't in the cards? Well, then it boils down to how strong the bond is with these other people involved. Acquaintances, well then honey, build yourself a bridge and get over it - It's not the worth the aggravation and stress, you are better off just letting them go. But a truly close friendship? You have to have a discussion with them. Ask if their comfortable with continuing the friendship, regardless of the ex's dismay and being completely out of the picture - No matter how sappy talking about your feelings may be to you, and even with the fear of the frustration, it doesn't matter ... It has to be done.

"Ex And The Suburbs"

A relationship with an ex can be extremely confusing/stressful. Whether you two were friends prior to dating, or if were complete strangers, things can tend to get very awkward with an ex...

If you were friends beforehand, you're new relationship with them will likely not be as it was prior to being exclusive with them. The past never fades away into the wind, regardless of how much we want or wish it to. You cannot take things back, they are what they are. Some people say they don't want to initiate a relationship because they fear the threat of possibly losing a great friendship if the relationship fails. This's very understandable to me. There would likely be intense sexual frustration among those who still care for and love one another romantically, or straight up awkwardly terrible tension if they don't feel that way ... Now, don't go telling the computer that I'm wrong, and you've got yourself a great friendship with your ex. I'm not saying it's impossible and you cannot be friends, but it's highly unlikely things will be the same as before dating. Think this over - Is your friendship that great, that you don't see yourself having hard feelings, or reminders of the past that make you want to ignore them as some form of avoiding those memories of you two when happily together? Where you never see yourself wishing the past to be your present and your future because you have no idea where things went so wrong? Are you so sure there are no lurking romantic emotions? Think about it my lovelies.

Maybe you decide to go the other route, cutting your ex out of your life everlastingly ... Burning all of the pictures, erasing (s)he's phone number off of your phone, and perhaps even *gasps* unfriending and/or unfollowing them from and on Facebook and Twitter. Which could cause tension for your mutual friends, when thinking about how many people you may be hurting by doing all of this. It's not only the ex, but (s)he's family and/or friends that actually liked you. Then what are you supposed to do in this situation? You're going to end up crossing paths at some point, and what do you think you can do? Run away from it all? That doesn't tend to work out so well.

Do you want my advice? Well, whether you would like it or would not, I'm going to give it. I suggest you maintain some form of a decent friendship, or at least an acquaintanceship. Don't play rough, and with whatever you do, don't be bitter about anything. It's the easiest way and from personal experience, it's simply the best way to handle things. With my ex, we still talk on the telephone from time to time or text to touch base. Actually, we both attended a small bowling party gathering recently and both had a killer time, with little to no awkwardness. Yet, we aren't trying to front a strong and wonderful friendship. Our mutual friends feel comfortable and at ease, leaving nobody to get hurt.  

Warning : DON'T, and I repeat, DON'T make your friends choose between the two of you. That makes you nothing but an immature bitch (or a bastard). It conflicts and hurts everyone who is involved. Nobody, and I am serious when I say nobody, will escape unscathed.